“I am whom i am. Love it or Hate it ”

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Just some thoughts and am not going to mention names in here.

It was more or less my first time not knowing how to console someone, in fact, yes i do feel helpless and scare at that point in time.

It was middle of the night when we were at the back alley of a quiet street with dim lightings. You wanted to smoke and that's why we were there. Started off our chit chatting session and your simple whining. Things grew intense, you spoke of her. You told me the memories that you would wanted to hide at the deepest, the place where you wish no one will discover and will unfold it.

It was your first, and she has been there for almost 8 months with you having a direct connection to her. I know how precious that connection was to you, back then and now. It was her that gives you courage to face pregnancy and surgery, be it how painful it is. The moment when you see her, you know she was the best gift you have ever had or will have. But the blessing lasted only 3 days and she was never in your arms anymore.

Then, the decision day came when everything seems to be falling apart for you. It's a decision that NO ONE will want to make and will be able to make. Yet, you were force to. I know you love her dearly and you cannot bear to let her go. But she has to go.

It has been a major impact on you and i apologize i wasn't there when it first happened. I know the scar will always remind you of her. Even until now, it's near to her 2 years old birthday. The feeling of missing her grew more each day, the memories of her in your arms keep appearing in your dreams, insomnia came and you couldn't focused at work.

At that moment when you were crying and telling me. I could do nothing, but to hug you tightly and cry together with you. That's the most i could do, burst into tears with you. I know you want to try again and i could sense your fear. I could feel your pain, tear and heartache.

But please, you have to continue trying. She may be gone forever, but she lives in your memories. Sorry, i will not ask you to forget her because i know you couldn't. I will ask you to remember her, in your heart, mind and soul. Then, when you have another one, divert all your love for her over.

We were spotted by people and we decided to head by to the cozy pub, sitting by the bar counter. Your friends were consoling you while i remove my shelter and strong self, cried quietly. I was overwhelmed by the heartache, pain and fear and tears just start swelling up. I couldn't stop at all. You were silly to think i was crying because of my breakup, because i misses my ex. But i was crying for you, on behalf of you and to you.

It's still disturbing me now and i don't know what i can do to help you. I'm sorry that i couldn't help you or be there in the past when you needed someone badly. But now, if you need someone, i'm just a bbm away.

Take care and be strong.
We will walk it through together with you.

With love,
Karine

I shall not be lazy for once to upload more photos. HA! Alright! im done with my exams and now, it's holiday. WOOHOOOOOO! :D

Some updates:

Went out with laopos and DH to have a light supper in Cafe Cartel. It was nice chatting with them and we had fun. :) More of such gathering please. :))))))






Went to meet ah ling darling to cut my hair, followed her to her regular salon and i decided to let the stylist decide on the style, now im loving it. Although it's shorter but my curls became more obvious just like those natural wave. :)))))))) Anyway, we went shopping after it and had our private girl talk for like hours. :) Love and treasure the feeling. Thank you my friend.



Meet up with Melodee after very very very long. She invited me to her house first to wait for her to get change. Feels weird and strange to be going to somewhere so familiar yet not especially when i went to peek a boo into his room. Still the same scent, still the same fixtures but i guess everything else changes. O'well. Had a great bowling session with Mel and Dom and i was being scolded badly for not bowling for a year. HA!

At least now im back to bowling, the feeling is great! but not to the 7 games of holding my dear 14 pound ball. LOL! More session required. :)

AND, i seriously love Iphone's apps when it comes to photo-taking man. so envy.




Goldfish me. :)))))




Then due to my baobei's impromptu feeling of wanna go out, we decided within hours to head down to Ice-skating. :) and we found 2 damn siao on guys, Alan and Alvin. So nice to come out with such short notice. I like. :))))) Oh, it was Baobei's first time skating and she did a great job. I had a great fall as well. HA!



Love my baobei.... :))))))



That's all for now, heading to Seoul Garden later. OMG. Why am i so packed? LOLOLOLOL!



Today marks the day for my last paper, wasn't 100% prepared but at least, i mugged for the slightest hope to score. HA! good luck to myself, will update on how GG the paper is, THEN! i will be freeeeeeeeeeeeee!

A Side note to Pearllyn San,
Please take note that on the 18-20th, you are being booked by me and please, arrange one day, we need to go BEDOK 85 to eatttttttttttttt :D


*Edited*

Last paper was another GG paper, dint study the theory part and yet, 37% were full of theory. HA! but i left the exam hall like 1130 am. Holiday mood. Totally ignore the outcome as long as i passssssss. :)

With love,
Karine

Why why why why why?????????????

O'well, If you all realise, i change my blogskin. Despite i was having my examination, i still spare sometime to decorate and renovate my blog! hahahah! no la, just feel that ELMO is cute, but i think it has no relation to me anymore. HAHAHA! it was originally editted for someone, but since it is no longer the meaning for that. I need to change back to a simple blogskin that i always like.

Hope you people like it too alright?

And also!!!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MR ALAN KHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Stay cheery as usual alright!!! :)

Friday's Marketing 201 paper was a GG paper! Seriously. The preparation for the exam itself is mind taxing or should i say, haunting. HAHAHA! i bet Pearllyn will know exactly how i felt during that period, the insomnia with dreams like Textbook falling on me. HAHAH! THAT'S CRAZY.

Afterall, i did not much bother or being affected by the paper, i am just so glad that it's over and done with.

Anyway, i seriously think i need to buy some vitamins, looking at the rate i'm falling ill like nobody business. Yes yes, i know i'm not taking good care of my own health, not sleeping enough and yes, yada yada... So many things! but hey, at least i'm enjoying my life right now!!!! That's more important. :D

I still have another paper next Thursday and afterwhich, i will be freed till adapting on the 14th for a turning point!!!!

And updates for my fellow love ones, i am slowly moving on, it's a good news don't you people think? Everyone changes, despite all the promises he used to give, he change. But at least, i know he's enjoying himself with all the entertainment he has gonna for himself. I will lead my life tooooooO!

With loves,
Karine

Here's to all the girls who used to be his number one. The ones who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning & be disappointed. The ones who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, & moved on with your life , only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. Those of you who cried on the first day you talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The ones who listened to him say, "I only want to be your friend" one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves & misses you.

We deserve something, and this is our tribute. Here's to the ones that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change . We listened to our friends tell us that we we 're stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, & even snuck around to see him for while .

We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking we would be just friends, & ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time.

And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us. Here's to the ones who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days.

Here's for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn't possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us . We learned to settle for someone who didn't treat us the way we should be treated.

Here's for the ones who did their hair and makeup & put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn't see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn't believe that he could do this to us again.

This is for those great girls, who loved him more than words can say, & took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn ' t bear to look back on their lives one day & wonder "what if". This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, & cried during the entire conversation.

The ones who hoped he would realize that he deserved better, that he deserved us. When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with her, he didn't mean it. This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with .

This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, & get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that " things were going too fast, he needs time ". Here's to the girls who couldn't cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt.

The ones who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again. This is for the ones who couldn't bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an " I told you so ". The ones that could just tell that they had made a mistake by ever allowing him into their hearts & their dreams again.

We knew that we deserved better the entire time that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that. Here's for the ones that finally realized that he never gave a crap about them.

Here's for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, & the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here are for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better .

This is for those confusing days, when you miss him & want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong and remember that relationships are like broken glass; sometimes it's better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together & get hurt.

Remember the times you cried & how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When 'your song' comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made & tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don't answer the door.

Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation & the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the hell he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night & how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn't him, and realized that once again, he hadn't called when he said he was going to.

One day you'll find a guy, who's worth all the tears, but he won't make you cry . You may think that you'll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It's going to hurt like hell, & it's going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal. This is for those girls who fell back in love with their ex, only to get hurt all over again.

I seriously wonder what is in the mind of an adult man! hahahaha!

Out movie, dinner and chilling at TCC with two brothers, haven seen them at least for like 5 years? and because of Facebook, we reconnected and decided to meetup. :)

I dint know that one of them were already a signed-on Airforce. So proud of him lor! hahaha.

I seriously believe talking craps is the hidden talent within the 3 of us and they taught me alot on man's thinking. They were wild, playful and they spoken to me like a brother to brother talk without embarrassment. HAHAHA!

Gained knowledge like what's FISHTANK! LOL! and know more about their individual's 风流 lifestyle. They seriously gonna get their Karma soon man! HAHAHAHAH!

But it was a nice chill out and im shagged now, chilling out is fun but until 2am when you are suppose to wake at up 7am! lol.

More chill out More chill out~

3 cheers to your Honda Civic la! MORE RIDES AND MORE MEET-UP PLEASE YOU TWO! :)

with loves,
Karine

P.S: Robin Hood was nice, just like a war show.